Often times those around the addict do not realize that they need some help as well. It is easy to blames one’s troubles on a sick person because that way they don’t have to look at themselves and their actions. Like the addict, they are slowly drawn into dysfunctional thinking and behaving and the longer it goes on the harder it is to pull out. Making excuses for the addicted one is a primary example of dysfunctional behaviour. There is no reason to expect the addict to change if they have excuses all around them for what they are doing. “Poor so in so, they had a hard life. No wonder they use drugs and drink.” Bullshit. They maybe did have a very hard life but it is possible to change but not if everyone is making excuses. The reason that I know this is because I know tons of people who have had a bad life but they changed. Humans are more resilient than the media portrays. If they have the “want to” then they can find the “how to” but until then it can be a sad ride, especially if there are those who make it impossible for the addict to have a crash landing and finally see themselves.
Undertaking addiction assessments on employees that have found themselves in this procedure has been my work since 1995 when new safety regulations that govern the transportation industry came into effect. I have assessed many employees for addiction. The intent was to assess and to make a decision based on the assessment if the employee needed help prior to returning to work for safety and due diligence purposes. Some were addicts and some were not. Some needed help and some did not. The types of people I have dealt with have ranged from the sensible and cooperative to the loud and hostile. Some of the employees had not faced limits and boundaries regarding their alcohol and drug usage prior to running into the procedure. They either never heard the word “no” or they were able through manipulation to get around the word “no” in some way that has worked for them in the past. I had to deal with habitual behavior that was hurting the person and had possible safety implications for themselves and others. Slowly, however, when an employee sees that the workplace is firm on its committment to a safe envirnonment they can make a choice for themselves.
At one time, in the not so distant past, it was considered reasonable and ok to hide someone’s symptoms of addiction no matter how bad it got. Co-workers and managers – they all did it! The problem is that the actual issue never got solved and that addiction just gets worse over time. Hiding someone’s symptoms hurts them and the whole company not to mention it is a very unsafe thing to do that creates liability. The addict never gets to see the mess that they are making and in order to recover they have to see their mess. If someone with a problem can be treated ethically then why would you want to hide their symptoms? To keep the workplace safe, addiction is one of those things that must be tackled.
Ways to help individuals who experience problems is continually evolving and hopefully advancing. The help evolves because we as a society learn from our mistakes and our successes. We try to repeat our successes and minimize the mistakes. For example, as seen from popular television programs, interventions with addicts are becoming a common practice because they have a chance of helping a sick individual on drugs or alcohol. The intervention is supposed to break through the addict’s defense for enough time so that they see how pathetic they actually are and know that they do need help. Once they see this reality they can go into treatment and change. The way that interventions are carried out are evolving and being modified but the core dynamic is still the same. A break in the walls of denial for the addict, reality appears, and this jolts them into hopefully making a decision to change. Action comes out of that decision.
Every recovered person that I have ever seen or made contact with has changed, not because things were going good, but because things were getting bad. Something had to happen to them that pushed them into making a decision. I don’t believe that I have ever heard of anybody in my 30 plus years around the addiction recovery world who had a serious problem with alcohol or drugs that just decided to change for the heck of it. It does not happen that way.
The ability to work and make an income is very important to an addict. (Most addicts are working and are all around you) The workplace, if managed correctly, can have a tremendous influence upon a person with a drinking or drug problem. Some companies set firm boundaries in their workplace around alcohol and drug usage because of the threat to safety. At the same time, built into the procedure was a method to treat people with problems ethically so that there is also have a way out and they addict is forced to look at themselves and reality is given a chance to sink in. They are basically given a chance to make a decision to change. The workplace can be a very effective place to help addicts.
This workplace is also where the addict can be detected and dealt with before other areas in our society become involved like the health or legal system. If the workplace has a practical procedure for dealing with substance abuse then they are in a position to help. I have seen many people recover because their workplace was using a system to help them. Employees that are involved in this procedure hear the message that something must change and from this simple cornerstone movement begins.
Addiction breeds a certain type of people called enablers. Enablers prevent the addict from seeing their problems so something has to change for the addict to get better. Enablers are created slowy and over time becasue of manipulation of the addict. If you are an enabler that wants to change then ask yourself what your responsibility is here in this situaiton. I believe that this is the key to helping someone with an addiction and the key to changing one’s own behaviour. Take your responsibility and give back what is not yours. You can’t change someone else but you can change yourself. It is not impossible but it is a process and you may need support. You may have a habit of acting and thinking in a certain way but it is just a habit that can be changed. You learn to replace ineffective actions with another behaviour. Information on this site can help you wether it is in the workplace or in your own home.